Sunday, 15 June 2014

The sound of him


"See you at dinner tonight" were his last words before he left for hunting that afternoon. 

Now she is fragile and enervated, but only physically. 

Every evening she stumbles her way towards the door and opens it to someone. Maybe she hears him come. Maybe he’ll come.





                                                      

51 comments:

  1. This was poignant and beautiful. I used to work with the elderly, and this was such a lovely description of so many that I knew and loved. I loved this, because it touched me and took me to another place and time. Well done!!!

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    1. It's inspired from a story my grandmother had told him long ago. I'm so glad it had that effect on you too which it had on me.
      Your gracious compliments made my day! Thank you so much :)

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  2. awww..:-( the emotions are so well captured, wonderful!

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    1. Thank you Uma. I guess when you actually feel the other soul, you can capture it well too!

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  3. Hope..never dies in the strong..its nice:)

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    1. Hope is what keeps us going in the high tides that life brings to to.
      Thank you A Writer. Welcome to my blog :)

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    2. Brings us* to. God bless my brain!

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  4. This is a touching tale indeed.....and the title is perfect for the longing in this piece.

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    1. Thank you C.C. Her longing had to be justified.

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  5. This makes me feel sad, it reminds me of my grandmother towards the end if her life. Beautifully written, you capture this subject matter with such a light touch.

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    1. I'm sorry about your grandmother. She must have been a strong woman! May God give strength to the old, calling souls out there.
      Thank you for appreciating :)

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  6. This is beautiful...the emotions evoked are so strong!

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    1. I'm glad you could feel the emotions here. Thank you !

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  7. Beautifully crafted. Hope is eternal, for this woman, anyway.

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    1. For us all believers, hope shall be eternal. Thank you Susan :)

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  8. Aww that's so said but her faith and believing is beautiful.

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    1. She is a beautiful old lady :)
      Welcome to my blog.

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  9. The heartbeats tied with threads of longing and waiting. Lovely 42.

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  10. sad- especially with the image.

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    1. Adding the image wasn't intended to make you sad though. ;)
      Thank you for stopping by!

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  11. Unique, poignant take on the prompt. The rhythm and sounds of those last 3 lines are really lovely.

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    1. Thank you so much Jennifer! I love hearing comments from you :)

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    1. Thank you Ishan. Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder in fact ;)

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  13. Such a beautiful story, even though it leaves you sad.

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    1. Thank you! Don't be sad for the lady, she isn't feeble :)

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  14. So touching, Soumyaa...
    Still waiting for her loved one...Hope rules in her heart...

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    1. And she probably knows too that he's never going to be back. Atleast not alive!
      Thank you for stopping by Anita.

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  15. Such sad longing left with unfinished business. 'Hunting' gives it a tragic edge.

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  16. I can actually feel her pain :( What torture it must be to wait eternally. So well written, Soumyaa!

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    1. true, it must have caused her a lot of pain.
      Thank you Shailaja :)

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  17. Oh this one made my cry, but it's beautifully done.

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    1. I'm glad the old woman could reach your soul :)
      Thank you!

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  18. Your calling attention to the fact that she's only physically fragile adds so much to the subject's personality. Very well written!

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    1. Thank you so very much. I wanted to show how she's still mentally upright and strong.

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  19. This is so moving, Soumyaa. I especially love this, for how it sounds and what it means: "Every evening she stumbles her way towards the door and opens it to someone."

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    1. It feels so good hearing comments like yours Meg. That's the first thing I read in the morning today, and hurray! :)

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  20. Powerful words that moves us to no end..the unflinching belief:)

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    1. Unflinching it was!
      Thank you for your appreciation Vishal .

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  21. A very moving plot. My heart goes out for her.

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  22. So touching :( True love still exists. Loved it Soumyaa :)

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  23. Awww..that is so moving and touching...a stirring piece indeed

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  24. Hi, this is a very touching ! Hope she will not be disappointed.

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  25. what a poignant story. Beautifully penned.

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